Horrible Bosses is great, no understatement, I was crying laughing.
Remember when jason bateman was not funny and nobody liked him?
Next: after watching this video I plan on ditching my own current CEO position and working under Kenny Powers.
That's all I have to say about that.
Over the last few months I've bought a house, started a business, delt w/ unexpected situations that are unable to quantify but generally stayed in shape throughout the entire process, however my 8 pack is lacking and it pisses me off. So, just like always, experiments on myself have ensued.
I want to keep as much mass as I can, I'm 6'4" 225lbs right now (a little light, but not bad), and sticking somewhere around 10% bodyfat (enter robert deniro face + disappointment, not awesome).
If I can't throw an awesome bomb by taking my shirt off, I'm not happy. Just kidding, I'm a fat face person.
No drastic changes, a few but nothing over the top.
Yes, drastic change. I've begun to eat like an animal created by the offspring of a lion, a horse and and a small hispanic family (minus the rice). Meaning I eat tons of meat, tons of green stuff and tons of beans (surprisingly mexican food has been the easiest way to maintain this if I am to eat out....unexpected and I like it. Mi amor comida de mexico).
I've allowed myself one day/wk to dramatically binge on anything that taunted me during the week. So that pizza that wanted to talk shit all week, yeah, he got his chewed up and shit out on sunday....bitch.
It was a tough decision but I cut some things that have been staples in my diet FOR YEARS.
-no steel cut oats
-no fruit (yeah, I know right)
-no potatoes (even sweet potatoes....tough one)
Some stuff I was already doing. For instance:
-No dairy (besides greek yogurt but who cares)
-No wheat, rice or grains in general
Now I get 100% of my carbs (outside of that one day food freak parade) from ridiculously low glycemic index, low glycemic load, and low insulin index foods. Basically that means I get my carbs from:
-vegetables (about 5-9 cups/day)
-legumes (beans and such)
-seeds and nuts (mainly quinoa, almonds and walnuts)
My protein sources haven't really changed much:
-Beef, chicken, pork, eggs
And the reasoning for the one day food parade that I've absolutely dominated for the last 3 weeks?
1) Denying your body calorically dense foods for too long can actually have a negative impact on endocrine function (hormones) as well as other bodily functions (especially in regards to fat loss and muscle maintenance). Taking one day/wk is not enough to create a drastic change to overall fat gain or loss. So even though the scale will tell you that you've gained 'weight', the progress you've had w/ 'fat' will not have been discouraged, as continual measurement (using the scale one or two days/wk maximum) will indicate.
2) Mentally it's just kind of nice to let it fly for a day. You know, you're out w/ friends, it's the weekend, it's summer, you want to swim, eat brats, pizza, drink beer, sip margaritas, flirt w/ the coolest girl at the party and generally live the life of every rich, overweight, happy person you know. So screw it, live it, do it, let loose for a day you uptight nutrifreak.
Now, obviously this diet is not sustainable, not even close. I just want things to happen fast to get back to my normal narcissistic self that loves walking by glass buildings, you know why.
All jokes aside, this type of regimen works, no doubt about it, it's mentally sustainable for the time anyone needs to lose what they currently have. It's perfectly safe, really it's way more safe and beats the hell out of 90% of americans day to day diet, and I'm not talking about the stereotypical fast food, hamburger helper dumbasses either, or even the people who think eating panera, subway or "pick your own asian place" was a good choice.
So far, no doubt about it, the ripples are in resurgence and there's less love to grab on the lower back side of my torso (love handles, for the slow and impaired that may or may not understand my humor....it's kind of out there).
You may ask how I keep the sheets from floating at night....Well, I have my tricks for that too.